Friday, April 16, 2010

Crazy or Brilliant?

It's spring, so of course that means I've been doing a lot of spring cleaning.  I've found that while I'm doing menial tasks like dusting, vacuuming and washing windows, my mind tends to wander.  Here are some not necessarily cleaning-related things I've been pondering.
  • Flea collars and miscellaneous flea prevention products - If they work to repel fleas and ticks on animals, would they work for people?  Let's say, for example, that you wanted to go for a walk in the woods.  Instead of tucking your pant legs into your socks to keeps ticks from getting on your legs, could you put flea collars around your ankles to repel them?  Or could you rub the liquid flea and tick preventer on your jeans?  If you're wearing shorts, could you rub it on your legs?  It's safe to use on your cats and dogs, after all.
  • Vacuum cleaners - My vacuum cleaner has a great habit of shooting debris back out at my feet after it's passed through the rotating bristles.  I'm beginning to think of it as rearranging the crumbs on my kitchen floor more than removing them.  I propose rating vacuum cleaners on a "suction" scale instead of by the amount of amps they have (higher amps are supposed to indicate increased suction, but I have not found that to be the case).  Wouldn't we all prefer to have a model that really sucks instead of one that really sucks
  • Languages - I can speak a little bit of several different languages, but not nearly enough to call myself fluent in anything but English.  If I make up my own language, can I call myself bi-lingual?
  • Commercials - 1) Have you seen that commercial for the refrigerated dog food?  The one where the mom is feeding her kids dry food out of a bag?  They rationalize that if you wouldn't feed dry, bagged food to your family, you shouldn't feed it to your dog.  I have no problem with their product, but I think the comparison is a little off base.  Dogs and humans have very different palates.  I've never found my kids eating the hot dogs that fell off the grill into the dirt.  They don't lick their hindquarters, either (not that my kids have hindquarters.....oh, you know what I mean!).
  • Commercials - 2) There's a commercial, I haven't seen it in a while so I don't remember the brand, but it's for shampoo.  The actress, sporting a lather covered head, says that they guarantee the shampoo will respect every strand of hair on your head.  I think that's one of the stupidest things I've ever heard!  How could you prove it one way or the other?  Could you take legal action?  And what would people say if you told them you were suing because your shampoo disrespected your hair?
  • Local news - I was listening to the radio, one day, and I heard a promo for the local news.  It went something like this (and I'm not making this up), "You may be poisoning your family with a common kitchen utensil found to be radioactive.  We'll tell you about it today at 6:00."  Wha??  In the name of ratings, this channel is going to let me (potentially) poison my family by flipping our burgers with a (potentially) radioactive spatula if we eat before 6:00?  I forgot to tune in at 6:00 that day.  I may still be using a radioactive kitchen utensil!  
  •  Butterfly - The name doesn't make sense, Flutterby is more logical.  Could they have been called flutterbies, originally?
  • Why do we have words with multiple meanings?  Rose, for instance.  Whether your talking about the flower or the past tense of rise, rose is the appropriate word to use.  Other words have the same pronunciation, but different spellings, like threw and through.  Why not have a completely different word for everything?  I'll keep that in mind as I create my own language.
 Crazy or brilliant, I'll leave that for you to decide.


Kathy said...

I have often thought that same thing about flea collars and products! I say we are brilliant!!!

angeltastic said...


Raoulysgirl said...

I think that you think too much...which must mean I think too much...because I do this, too!

I often tell Raouly that I think I use so much of my precious gray matter with these crazy "mind wanders" that it's really no wonder that I can't remember where I put the keys!!!

Purple Flowers said...

You make some very good points about vacuum cleaners, and butterflies. And with the word 'through'. The English language can be very confusing. I have sympathy for those trying to learn it.

Matty said...

Start a journal of all these thoughts you have. When they add up, make a book out of them. Get it published in different languages. That's what some guy did with his thoughts about simple things that make him happy, and now he has a best seller.

Betty said...

I loved what you said about vacuum cleaners and butterflies!
Love your writing style!
Hope you have a great weekend!
Betty xx

Pearl said...

How about goofy? :-) Can "goofy" be one of the options?


Making me laugh, as usual,


Jenny said...

What a totally great post! Although I think you may have to cut back on the caffeine just a teensy bit!

5thsister said...

Hmmmm. I feed dried, bagged food to my family! It's called cereal!

Well, you already know that I think you're brilliant and a little on the eccentric side. Wonderful post!

lisleman said...

good stuff here.
Yes we need a suck meter for our vacuums.
Commercials most are very stupid. It's rare that I like one. The funny ones are good.
I share your interest in words. I just saw Jerry Seinfeld (yes he still does standup) and he had a funny part about phrases. He questioned the phrase "blow smoke up your a--". Really who was first person to come up with that? Did some one try it?

Holly said...

Perhaps crazy and brilliant! Don't those two go hand in hand?

I live in a dog crazy place and there are people here who would run into the street to save a dog but not a kid (I kid you not!), so while the dog/kid comparison is way off to me...I see where it comes from.

I am sure I am poisoning my family...let me know if you find out what it was.

Kimberly said...

I do this too, especially during cleaning day when the dogs are not barking...that makes me lose concentration.

I wonder if this is how philosophy started.?